Actress Gillian Anderson Women often keep sexual fantasies to themselves
A year and a half ago, Gillian Anderson ("The X-Files", "Sex Education") called on women to submit their erotic fantasies anonymously. Now the actress presents her book and explains what she has learned.
08.09.2024, 16:26
dpa
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- Actress Gillian Anderson collected anonymous erotic fantasies from women.
- She was surprised at how many women still keep their fantasies to themselves.
- With the book, Anderson wants to initiate a new discourse on the sexual power of women.
Actress Gillian Anderson (56) has collected women's sexual fantasies for a new book. A year and a half ago, she called on women to anonymously submit their erotic fantasies - now a selection of the letters has been published in the book "Want".
In total, she received letters amounting to almost 1,000 pages, Anderson writes in the foreword to the collection of texts.
"I found it surprising that many women still keep their fantasies to themselves, even today. Some are strong, proud and confident and celebrate their sexual power, but quite a few also feel shame and guilt because they long for satisfaction and fulfillment during sex," explains Anderson.
"New dialog about women's sexual power"
In our society, women are often pigeonholed and reduced to certain identities and roles, writes Anderson, "but the fantasies collected here prove that no woman has just one identity".
If she had one wish for the book, it would be to provide food for thought "so that we can enter into a new dialog about the sexual power of women".
The texts get down to business. They are brief insights into a wide variety of scenarios. Some more predictable ("I want my partners to adore me") than others ("Sometimes I'm one of the survivors of a zombie apocalypse").
It's about passionate moments with men, women, lots of people. Many of them make you wonder whether someone should be looking over your shoulder while you're reading on the train.
Feelings of shame, excitement and performance
What the collection also shows: That quite a few women still struggle with feelings of shame, insecurities and the question of what actually arouses them.
"Most of the things that happen in porn are tailored to men," reads one comment, "and so many expectations are placed on us women that I hardly know whether something really turns me on or whether I'm just performing what is required of me."
The book is intended to tie in with Nancy Friday's "The Sexual Fantasies of Women" from 1973. She did not include scenarios that crossed the line into illegality, Anderson said in a BBC interview.
Fantasies do not have to be lived out
Nevertheless, there were letters that bordered on dangerous topics. Not including them would have felt inadequate. But that doesn't mean that women want exactly that to happen, Anderson warned.
A psychologist quoted by the BBC took a similar view. Fantasies about extreme submission or violent acts, for example, are not meant to be acted out. "They provide a safe place to explore interests and desires that are considered taboo, dangerous or socially unacceptable."
The value of "Want" lies in showing the diversity of female fantasies and the complex thoughts that women have about them. Sometimes candles flicker and the soundtrack from "Dirty Dancing" plays, sometimes it's about bodily fluids or an encounter with the musician Harry Styles. Often it's simply about the desire to be admired.
"There is no such thing as a typical fantasy"
"Reading the letters made me realize once again that the typical fantasy is as rare as the typical 'woman'. What we want from our sex lives is as different as what we want from work, our relationships and love," Anderson writes. "We all differ, even within ourselves."
The actress also wrote down her own fantasy, anonymously of course, like the other writers. She was surprised at how long it took her to write, Anderson told the BBC, even though she feels comfortable with the subject of sexuality. "I didn't expect to be so shy and nervous about it myself."
Gillian Anderson, who comes from the USA and lives in London, became famous with the mystery series "The X-Files". Since then, she has shot numerous projects, such as the series "Sex Education", in which she plays a sex therapist.
