Aubrey Plaza talks about "daily struggle" after her husband's death

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• Jeff Baena, US director and husband of actress Aubrey Plaza, died by suicide on January 3, 2025 at the age of 47.
• Plaza has now spoken publicly about her grief for the first time, describing it as a daily struggle that she compares to an "ocean of awfulness".
• Despite their separation in September 2024, the two remained close.

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On January 3, 2025, US director and screenwriter Jeff Baena died at the age of 47. Baena also gained fame through his relationship with actress Aubrey Plaza. After almost seven months, she has now broken her silence about her husband's suicide.

On the podcast "Good Hang", the "The White Lotus" star explained in conversation with fellow actress Amy Poehler: "Right now, in this moment, I'm happy to be with you. Generally speaking, I'm here and I'm functioning." Plaza is "grateful that I can move in this world. I think I'm doing well, but of course it's a daily struggle."

"A huge ocean of awfulness"

She compares what she has been through so far this year to the plot of the horror film "The Gorge", which was released in 2025. "In the movie, there's a cliff on one side and a cliff on the other side, and there's a gorge in between, and it's full of all these monster people trying to get you," Plaza explained. It's "a stupid comparison", but when the actress saw the movie, she immediately thought: "That's what my grief feels like. Or that's how it could feel. There's always a huge ocean of awfulness that I can see."

The 41-year-old revealed: "Sometimes I just want to jump in and be in it. Then again I try to distance myself. But the ocean of awfulness is always there."

Aubrey Plaza and Jeff Baena tied the knot in 2020. They had been in a relationship since 2011. They are said to have finally separated in September 2024, but the ex-couple had remained in close contact. Following the filmmaker's suicide, Plaza spoke of an "unimaginable tragedy" in a statement, asked for privacy - and has remained silent ever since.